Masculinity 101: How To Be A Good Role Model.

Masculinity 101: How To Be A Good Role Model.

What does it mean to be a man? What does it take to be a good one? What do we know about our own masculinity? What’s our definition of being a good male role model?
These are questions we should ask ourselves with some regularity. We change as people and as men. It’s easy to lose sight of ourselves when we focus solely on the outside. If we have clear answers it becomes easier to teach and lead by example.
We define these answers with our beliefs, experiences, upbringing, environment and relationships. And while the concept of masculinity has been evolving and expanding dramatically over the last few decades, it is important not to fall within rigid stereotypes or outdated ideas that could harm our children.
Embracing a definition of masculinity where we foster growth, connection, resilience and strength through introspection, determination and kindness is far more important than just being tough for the sake of being tough.
Being a good role model is every man’s responsibility. It shows our sons how to treat and care for those around them, and it shows our daughters what they should look for in the male figures in their lives. From having a solid framework to make memorable friendships in their childhood, and developing long-lasting healthy relationships that make them grow into better people every day, to becoming a positive instrument of change for society, we’ve put together a few tips on how to be the best role model for our kids.
1. Redefine Strength as Resilience and Kindness
Strength goes beyond muscle power or pushing down our emotions. And that’s something we need to teach our kids. Real strength stems from resilience. It’s in the face of adversity we truly show what we’re made of, where the courage to be kind in a world that can sometimes see compassion as a weakness, can break barriers and help us overcome any obstacle however difficult it might be.
When we conquer challenges, we’re teaching our children it’s okay to struggle as long as we persevere. At the same time, we show kindness by standing up for others, helping those in need, and being gentle even when it's easier to act tough.
This balance helps our kids see that being strong and kind are not opposites but two sides of the same coin.
2. Embrace and Model Emotional Honesty
Redefining what it means to "man up" by showing our children emotional honesty is a key part of modern masculinity. When we talk openly about our feelings— even if we’re frustrated or feeling the blues, we show that emotions are not a sign of weakness but a natural and important part of life.
Letting it out and crying when we’re overwhelmed, developing healthy emotional release habits, asking for help when we need it, and admitting when we’re wrong, teaches our kids that allowing ourselves to be vulnerable is not a flaw but a strength. It also encourages them to explore and embrace their feelings. Leading to building deeper, more authentic connections with those around them.
3. Break the Cycle by Challenging Our Own Biases
Challenging our prejudices is essential to our growth as human beings and most importantly as parents. Why do we believe what we believe?—Before passing our own beliefs onto our children, we should question why we adopted them in the first place, what impact they’ve had on our lives and what impact they could have on our children’s future.
Children absorb their beliefs from what they see and hear, when we’re able to question everything, including ourselves, it allows us to learn, grow and adapt so we don’t pass outdated or harmful stereotypes onto them.
Whether it’s checking our own privilege, leaving prejudices behind, or being mindful of how we speak about others, we set the example for our children to approach life with an open mind.
By showing them that it’s okay to challenge or change our perspectives and grow, we teach them that masculinity includes humility and the willingness to learn.
Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.
— Isaac Asimov
4. Demonstrate Healthy Leadership
Being tough and being kind are not contradictions but complementary traits. Life will require our children to stand firm in their beliefs and protect those they love, but it will also call for compassion and understanding.
We can teach them this balance by being assertive without aggression, and overcoming challenges with courage while treating everyone with care. Whether it’s protecting our families or lending a comforting hand, we can model how strength and tenderness can and should coexist.
If our children see us embrace both these traits, they will learn that masculinity can be a multifaceted spectrum that has a deep impact on those around us.
5. Encourage Purpose and Responsibility
Taking responsibility for our actions, admitting we made a mistake or following through on our commitments, shows our children the importance of accountability. It plants the seed of honesty, transparency and a strong ethical and moral core.
Having them participate in meaningful activities such as helping out with the chores or helping in the community, gives them an early sense of purpose and achievement. We can also inspire them with stories of men who have made a difference through hard work and dedication so they can see responsibility as a cornerstone of positive masculinity.
When we lead with purpose, we show our children how to live meaningful lives that contribute to something greater than themselves.
6. Develop Empathy as a Cornerstone of Strength
Empathy is one of, if not, the most valuable asset we can teach our children to develop. It all starts with how we have it present in our own lives. Taking the time to understand how others feel, even when it’s uncomfortable, shows us real masculinity involves caring deeply about the experiences of others.
We can actively listen to our children, validate their feelings, and encourage them to think about how every single one of their actions has an impact on everyone around them, including ourselves.
Demonstrating small acts of kindness, like giving a neighbour a hand, or comforting a friend, reinforces the belief that empathy is a sign of strength. When we foster empathy, we help our children develop meaningful relationships and navigate the world with compassion and respect.
Being a good male role model is not about embodying perfection, or fighting our emotions to appear invincible—it’s about being intentional, present, and determined to keep learning and growing. It’s about showing our children masculinity is not defined by outdated stereotypes of toughness or dominance but through a dynamic blend of resilience, kindness, strength, and vulnerability. It’s about leading by example, questioning old and present beliefs, and teaching our children the value of empathy, respect, and responsibility.
When we question ourselves, embrace change, and strive to be better, we’re not only enriching our lives but also help in shaping a generation that values authenticity and connection over dogmas and antiquated ideas. Our sons learn how to lead with integrity and compassion, and our daughters see what healthy masculinity looks like. In doing so, we create a ripple effect that extends beyond our families and social sphere, contributing to a more inclusive and empathetic society.
Ultimately, being a good male role model is not just a responsibility—it’s an opportunity. An opportunity to leave a legacy of love, strength, and understanding that will inspire those who follow us. Embracing it with purpose, humility, and relentless commitment to becoming our best selves for those who look up to us every day.